SMH Article: Sydney's Best Pies / The Pie Tin

A nice article from the SMH this morning folks:

http://www.smh.com.au/good-food/eat-out/sydneys-best-pies-20130914-2tqzo.html

I'm hoping that my old mate, the sexually ambiguous Nudgeball can hit a few of these for me (us) over the next few months. Seriously, the guy spends more time in front of a mirror than a Cockatiel, but he does seem to have an affinity for pies. 

I've been to Harry's Café de Wheels, The Upper Crust, and The Pie Tin from this list....all of them were good, but admittedly I was drunker than 10 sailors when I went to Harrys and would have eaten a dirty nappy through a park bench had the opportunity arisen.

For some reason, in this article they've chosen to review the pumpkin, fetta and silverbeet pie from The Pie Tin in Newtown - eeeeeeeww....'every bit as satiating as its meat counterparts', me tit.

That's not a pie, unless you're a deodorant avoiding, boho, tie-died-pants-wearing braless chick with arse-length dreads who helps out on her boyfriend's organic alfalfa sprout farm and it's your birthday so you think, 'hey why not splurge this year?' but after eating it you make yourself sick with worry that maybe not all the ingredients were 100% organic fair trade and some defenceless cow was probably exploited to make the butter for the pastry (did they ask her if they could take her milk?) so you decide that next time you'll just make a wheatgrass smoothie at home and invite a few friends over to listen to Angus & Julia Stone records and chill out instead.

I mean the fact that there are not 1 but 2 (count 'em) vegetarian pies (not to mention one cold pork pie) making the list of Sydney's best pies says to me that maybe Kate Gibbs wasn't the best person in the world to write the article. And before you go calling me a misogynist yet again, may I present the first exhibit for the defence: the pies that I ate when I went there....the Spicy Nepalese Lamb Curry pie:

Beautiful handmade-looking pie presented on a little metal plate - with a couple of little dried chilli seeds on top. Gorgeous.

Golfball-sized chunks of tender juicy lamb in a flavoursome spicy tomato gravy...on par with The Goat Pie Guy's Himalayan Curry Pie.

Good to the last bite - flaky pastry, meat that falls apart, quality gravy. Great pie. Effortlessly scored a 9/10.

Exhibit 2 for the defence: slow roasted shredded pork with apple and BBQ sauce (below):

Look at that lip - it's like a teenager taking a selfie!

OK, so this is either going to look really good to you, or bloody awful. It tasted fantastic. Very moist, sweet from the apple and BBQ sauce, and very porky in flavour. How are those slices of apple at the top...another winner. My only complaint was that it wasn't hot enough. I did eat it second, but I made allowances for cooling time and believe it still should've been hotter. For this reason I can only give it an 8/10.

I've got a feeling that this one above was a bangers and mash pie, but I'm not 100% sure as it was ordered by the Kirribilli Kanuck, who jabbed a finger at the window and said in his outrageous French Canadian accent: 'I'll 'ave dat one over dare, and dat one down dare. Merci beaucoup.' Then proceeded to demolish both before I could take photos.

I think this one was a Mexican pie of some description (sorry about the photography, the hands were a little shaky that day). It certainly looks red and angry enough to be Mexican. That's not a racist comment about Mexicans, by the way. They're brown. And placid. Tremendous people.

I don't know what the hell you're supposed to do with the condiments as there's so much flavour in the pies themselves, but they're a nice touch and well presented. The Kirribilli Kanuck said that the chilli relish went well with his bangers and mash pie, and had a nice hit of heat.

Then, in the unlikely event that you still have room for dessert, there's the most incredible array of sweet pies you've ever seen. The pie on the bottom shelf on the far left is an apple pie that - no kidding - stood at least 6in tall. The pecan pie above it looked amazing, as did the key lime pie at the top right, and the apple blackberry lattice top pie would be the hero of any dinner party.

Oh, did I mention they also sell beer? Imagine washing your pulled pork and apple pie down with a Dirty Granny cider....mmmmm. Welcome to flavour country.

Yep, The Pie Tin in Newtown is the complete package, pie-wise. Due to limited numbers (of pie-tasters), we didn't get to try other mouth-watering temptations such as:

• slow roasted north African style lamb with chermoula
• spicy Cajun style pork, slow cooked with corn & black beans
• sweet roasted duck and seasonal vegetables
• corned beef with white sauce and capers
• slow roasted beef brisket with hickory smoke and mushrooms.

I could go on, but I'm sure you're getting the picture.  Why in the f*ck you'd pick a pumpkin, fetta and silverbeet pie in an article about great pies over any of the above is beyond me. Kate, you need to spend some time in the room of mirrors and take a bloody good hard look at yourself. 

Well Rimmer and I are off to LA and Vegas on Friday for a work conference. No really, it is. Honest! So your Pieologist is going to temporarily going to turn into the Burgerologist. I might do a short posting of any a particularly spectacular burgers, then normal (sporadic) service will be resumed.

If you're on Twitter, check out @thepieologist for any pertinent news updates (such as the KFC pie this week).

Until next time, take care folks and as the KK would say: au revior mes amis!

Cheers

Pieologist.


PS: many thanks to Mike & Scotty, both of whom forwarded the SMH article to me. Cheers guys.

KFC Zinger Pie Review

Well, I've just finished my KFC Zinger pie, and to be honest I feel a bit empty. Not in the 'gee I wish I had ordered more Wicked Wings because I'm still starving' kind of empty; more in the 'this had the potential to be anything, looked great, but just failed to deliver' kind of way.

To start with, it's a pretty good looking pie. The top is nice and flaky, and the paper bag (nice authentic touch) proudly states that the pie has been baked fresh daily.

Turning the pie out of its foil nest shows a lightly coloured base that is slightly undercooked in the manner of the Wavell Hot Bread Shop (see review). It also has quite a wide lip that gives you confidence that the pie is going to hold together under pressure.

Unfortunately it was about as stable as an Australian betting lineup, and it all went south pretty quickly as you can see from the last picture. Do not attempt to eat this pie whilst driving unless you are on your way back from the tip in your gardening clothes.

My first bite revealed a very soft base - which isn't an automatic fail in my book, but I know a few people who would starting marking it down immediately. I kind of had to take a couple of quick extra bites to even things up before it started slopping all over my desk, and you can see below how the slight pressure of my thumb has squished the pie innards over to the left hand side...and I'm an expert pie-handler. In the hands of an amateur, things could get very ugly, very quickly.

 The temperature of the filling was pretty well perfect - top marks there. Nice and hot without scalding anything.

The filling itself is very runny, bordering on sloppy; and you've got a combination of small chunks and shredded chicken floating about in a reasonably flavoursome gravy...all backed by the heat of the Zinger spices. There didn't appear to be any vegetables in there anywhere. Zinger is actually a pretty good descriptor for the flavour profile - it's not exactly hot hot, but there's a bit of zing there.

Being KFC, the pie (like everything else on the menu) is pretty salty. Personally, it's what attracts me to KFC in the first place, but if you don't like salt then this probably isn't the pie for you.

It's a standard-sized pie, so eating two won't be an issue for most people. Perhaps I had a premonition; perhaps I knew KFC well enough to know that it wasn't going to blow my hair back - but either way I opted for the box of Wicked Wings instead of a second pie - and I enjoyed them more than the pie itself.

Rimmer said that the pie 'wasn't a fail, and that it had to be worth a 6/10'. I think he's being a bit generous myself, and I felt it was more like a 5/10, with most of those points coming from the flaky top and perfect temperature. The rest was pretty average. Sorry Colonel, but maybe you should stick to what you know.

Breaking News: KFC releases a Zinger Chicken Pie - for a limited time

News just in: those wacky marketing guys at KFC HQ have come up with yet another cunning way to tap into the Australian psyche and make us obscenely obese at the same time: a chicken Zinger pie. For realisies.

It's on a limited run, and I haven't been down there to try it yet, but it looks pretty dang good in this article:

KFC Zinger Pie

Personally, I like the KFC hot and spicy mix and am keen to give it a try. Tomorrow, methinks.

Are there any initial thoughts from you good people out there in pieland? If anyone has tried one I'd be very keen to get your impressions - please post them below.

I'll be back to you soon with a report.

Cheers, The Pieologist.

The Goat Pie Guy

So this one weekend, Sports dragged me along to the markets at the Eatons Hill Tavern on Brisbane's north side. I was a little dusty from a late night the night before, and for reasons that don't bear repeating we had already been to the Rocklea markets at sparrows that morning, so the thought of another market experience that day was about as appealing as another 3 years of Julia Gillard. Did I say 3 years? Sorry, I meant minutes.

Anyway, my mood took a large bounce when I rounded a corner, the clouds parted, and a shaft of light from heaven settled on a stall emblazoned with the words, 'The Goat Pie Guy'. Halle-bloody-boo-yah!

I met the owner, Mick (lovely bloke) and he told me his story. BTW, that's not him above (but you can see him by clicking on the Facebook link below).

Mick was working as a chef at Spoon in James St The Valley, when his father in law came up from Tassie for a visit. Being a good son-in-law, Mick called him beforehand and asked if he had any special requests for dinner while he was in town. He requested a roasted shoulder of goat. What a great choice. So Mick got to work. He confit'd some garlic, pounded it up with thyme and lemon, and smeared it all over the shoulder before roasting it low and slow.

The father in law declared it a success, and immediately added that they needed to make it into a pie. What a thinker this guy must be. Big-picture kind of man. So the next day, Mick (who must be averse to sleep) stripped the remains of the roast and made it into a pie, which the family demolished with gusto. It was more of a success than the roast.

The following week, Micks wife Meg (also lovely) asked Mick if he could knock up a lazy 200 pies, as she had booked them a slot at the Newfarm markets. Mick, who was busting his hump from 4am - 2pm at Spoon, gave his heart a big rub and managed to bang out about 170. The markets opened at 6am. They were sold out of goat pies by 9am. So she booked him in for the next one. He knocked out 180. Same result. Fast forward a few weeks, and Mick is selling 600 by lunchtime and has developed a couple of new flavours. Fast forward a couple more weeks and he's given notice at Spoon and is a full-time goat pie-making machine. Mick now turns over around 1200 goat pies per week.

Every pie is hand-made. Literally. You can see how the (home made) short crust base is pressed into the pie tins by hand and crimped to the lid to form goaty works of art. They are made on a Thursday and Friday in Mick's commercial kitchen up at Strathpine somewhere and sold fresh to you on a Saturday and Sunday at the markets having never been frozen. He doesn't use fillers of cheaper meats, and all of the pies undergo a 6-hour braising process to ensure they're tender and juicy. They're egg-washed to produce a crispy golden top. Then there are the flavours...

That's fine craftsmanship there, folks.

The website lists 6 flavours, but there's a new one called The Guv'nor, plus Mick occasionally makes seasonal specials....like a scallop pie, which contained 8 roe-on scallops per pie in a white wine & confit garlic sauce. You can see why I was excited. Mick talks about his pies with a passion and enthusiasm that is evident in the first bite you take. These are seriously good.

The Indonesian

Salmon & Scallop pie

The Deluxe - slow cooked goat with honey and thyme; each pie has hand-piped port and redcurrant jus peeking out of the vent...the best part being that this melts into and through the pie when heated. Genius.

The Deluxe with port & redcurrant jus...mmmmmm

The Guv'nor - first, Mick toasts fresh rosemary to release the oils, then adds goat and English brown ale which is braised for 6 hours. Then, he caramelises red onion and combines it with marmalade for an added hit of flavour, adds Lancashire relish and plump beery raisins - all cut with apple cider vinegar for balance and topped with cracked pepper. An incredible depth of layered flavours which works on every level.

The Himalayan - a tomato based Nepalese curry which has a nice balance of sweet and tart in a smooth gravy with large chunks of tender goat. Left field, and really good.

The Indonesian - my favourite by a nose (over The Guv'nor). This is made with a rendang curry base. The challenge (as explained by Mick) is that a rendang curry gains its sweetness by cooking down the coconut-rich sauce, which caramelises around the chunks of meat and becomes slightly dry. Great for a curry, but no good for a pie. Mick solved this problem by making the sauce twice. The first one is to make the traditional sticky-dry caramelised rendang curry, and the second is to slightly loosen the mix so that the pie has the desired amount of gravy. As I said, genius.

Inner workings of the Indonesian

Good to the last bite...

The Grecian - derived from the first 'father-in-law' roast. Tender slow-braised goat with confit garlic, lemon, rosemary, and white wine. Just as good as it sounds.

I haven't had the pleasure of trying The Tuscan (tomatoes, Italian wine, herbs, chilli), or The Moroccan (cumin, coriander, ginger, turmeric, sweet potato & dates) yet, but I'll keep turning up and someday I'll get lucky and they will be in stock.

The Guv'nor - well-built, or what?

The Guv'nor

My only criticism - and it's a minor one - is that the heat can be a bit hit and miss depending on what time you get there and what demand has been like. I have had lukewarm, perfect, and scalding hot...but reheating them at home from frozen at 180 degrees (fan-forced) for 40 minutes gives perfect results every time. I haven't found that freezing these pies results in any discernible decline in quality at all, so stock up with confidence.

There is an increasing number of bakers out there claiming to be producing 'artisan' pies of true quality - and I'll concede that the overall quality of pies across the market is miles ahead of where it was only a decade ago. But there are very few people out there like The Goat Pie Guy. He understands flavour combinations, the layers and interplay between sweet, savory, and tart, he seasons his mixes well, and has the skills to pull all of the above into individually distinct pies that together form a stellar line up that any restaurant would be proud to serve.

I haven't individually scored the pies above; suffice it to say that they are all solid 8+, with the Indonesian an easy 9+.

You can find Mick's details on the website, place orders online, and find out where you can buy them from the man himself. If you're the kind of person who read the word 'goat' at the top and thought eeeeewwww, then you should really harden up and try one. Not only would you never pick it as goat if you didn't know; I guarantee that it will change any preconceived ideas you may have of goat as a product.  

Highly recommended.

The Goat Pie Guy Website

Facebook link - check this out! (if the Facebook banner doesn't make you hungry, you're not human)

Bally Bakehouse, 44 Woodbine St North Balgowlah

When Sydney correspondent Crashball sent in the following guest review of Bally Bakehouse, I read the Woodbine St address and my mind instantly zipped back 20 years to when DTK (last week's guest reviewer) and I were living in London.

Our friend Lodgie (dearly departed) was a mad Sheffield United fan, and introduced us to two things: black pudding, and the Greasy Chip Butty song.

The black pudding intro went thus: 'you see lads', he says to the new young 'uns in the office, counting off the ingredients on his sausage-like fingers and waggling his head from side to side, 'you've got blood, and fat, and spices...add in a couple of eggs and a bit of fried bread and a pint of bitter, and viola...breakfast of champions!'

The other thing Lodgie introduced us to was the Greasy Chip Butty song (sung to the tune of Annies Song):

You fill up my senses
like a gallon of Magnet
like a packet of Woodbines
like a good pinch of snuff
like a night out in Sheffield
like a greasy chip butty
like Sheffield United
come fill me again!
Na Na Na Naa Naa Naaaaa, ooo!

Well the lyrics don't really do it justice, so here you go:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RbSykXdaEqU

It's got the lot really - football, strong beer, strong durries, snuff, chip sandwiches....who wouldn't want to go to Sheffield?

Anyway as that has very little at all to do with this week's review, I'll cut my losses and move on. In May last year, Crashball gave us a review of arguably Sydney's (some say Australia's) best pie shop, The Upper Crust at Collaroy. This time, he's toddled around the corner to his local. Take it away, Crashball:

After recently discovering the PieApp for my mobile phone, I felt I had to kick the tires before getting your hopes up if the app failed to deliver.  The app uses the results of the Official Great Aussie Meat Pie Competition to show the location of winning (gold, silver and bronze) pies.  To my great delight, the app informed me of a bakery, just up the road form my place, that had taken a silver in the most recent competition (2012) for both their Beef Stroganoff and Chicken Cranberry & Camembert.  They’d actually taken Gold the year before.

I have to say, it felt like Christmas.  So I jumped on my BMX and made my way up the hill to a set of shops that could almost be my local milk bar......accept it’s in North Balgowlah, Balgowlah’s poor cousin, so I never go there unless I’m covered in paint or on my way home from the tip. [both of which seem to happen a lot - Pieologist]  Unfortunately I was so excited I forgot to take a picture of the store itself, but it was reasonably new and very clean in appearance, they sold more than just pies and everything looked quite enticing. I nearly bought a finger bun for old times. [Facebook to the rescue - see below]

I had to have the Beef Stroganoff and I would normally get a Beef and Mushroom to accompany, but switched today and purchased a Chunky Curry Beef and a Plain Minced pie for the ball and chain.  Since my last guest review, the old girl has actually grown to like the occasional pie, I don’t know if it's wisdom with age or the fact that she’s been accepted to become an Aussie, either way I’m not stopping to ask, it makes life easier.

All three pies were the same size, with the two ‘gourmet’ pies costing $5-95 and the plan mince meat $4-95, not bad for Syd-bend over AND give my your first born-ney.  As a side note: I was recently in London and found myself telling geezer mates how cheap I was finding their city, I don’t often agree with Queenslanders, but Sydney needs an uppercut.   As you can see from the picture, two of the three were beautifully brown whilst one looked a little anaemic.

Firstly, the Beef Strog and in this case; Michael in the Jacksons.  One word; disappointing.  The colour was a giveaway to its problems, it was undercooked.  As a result the base was too soft and the top wasn’t flaky.  The filling passed the driving test despite the slightly underdone case, but it was almost completely void of stroganoff flavouring.  I actually stopped eating the pie just after the photo and started on my second pie…. I finished it later, but that’s more a reflection on me. 4.5/10. 

Next up, the Chunky Beef Curry, I’m not a religious man, but A-fwarking-men.  This pie was cooked to perfection, the base was firm, the top flaky and the filling delicious with its ‘type A’ curry flavouring.  The pie definitely passed the driving test and was full of tender chunky beef.  It also had a surprising amount of heat.  I’ve been guilty of telling someone there’s not much chilli in the food, because I hadn’t noticed it and moments later I’m watching them stick their head under the water cooler, but I could tell this little puppy had kick. 9/10.

Lastly, the plain mince pie.  The wife puts tomato sauce on everything. I can serve up a beautiful bolognaise and she’ll smother it with tomato sauce before tasting it. So I had to grab my bite before she ruined it, so this was actually the first pie I tasted.  The base and top were the same as the Chunky Curry Beef and it passed the driving test. But it’s flavouring was a bland, I’d say the thing was aptly named; ‘Plain Mince’, that said, she’d eaten ¾ before I noticed and snapped the photo. 5/10 

Thanks for that bro. Great to see you're showing the little woman how we roll in Austraya by taking the first bite out of her pie. Kudos. 

FYI, the Great Aussie Pie Competition will be on again from 9-12th September. Stay tuned for a full report later in the year. 

http://www.greataussiepiecomp.com.au/

I must say that I have the Pie App on my phone too, and whilst Queensland bakeries are fairly poorly represented in the national competition, the app is certainly worthwhile if you like a pie (and let's face it, you wouldn't be wasting your time on this drivel if you didn't) and if you travel around the countryside, Leyland-brothers-style. 

Speaking of which, as I mentioned last week this arrived recently from Dicky who is lost in the outback somewhere (last heard of in south-western Qld). I'm not quite sure what the cutlery and sweet chilli sauce are doing on the plate, but:

Please forward to The Pieologist for consideration. Sorry, was so ravenous was almost finished before we remembered to take photographic evidence of this magnificent Curry Beef Pie, beautiful tasty onion, beef, golden crust with solid bottom (ha!) should pass the driving test. Where, you may ask? Hebel Store, just the right side of the Qld border. Their motto: "come and eat your heart out"!  R&S xx

Next week, Chris' secret family beef cheek recipe, and my own half-arsed attempt at making pies.

Until then, take care.

Cheers

Pieologist

Home Made Pies From Across The Dutch

Many of you will all recall my old Kiwi mate Chunderkilt, who sent in the hilarious review of Piggies Pies in March 2012...still one of our most popular reviews ever, based on pageviews. If you haven't read it or can't remember, I highly recommend you go back and take another look.

Well, he's been at it again - this time making his own pies at home. I must admit that I've done the same thing myself (I'll post my efforts next week so you can see how not to do it), but in the meantime it's over to Mike (PS: don't forget to click on the photos to see these beauties in their full-blown glory):

Kia ora bro and happy Anzac day.

In honour of our Anzac brotherhood I made a few pies last night...loosely inspired by a tomato knuckle casserole you cooked me in London. 

The photo's we're taken after they had spent a night in the fridge so look a bit dry but actually straight out of the oven they we're pretty good. Donna Hay helped out with the wooden chopping board-soft focus-diffused natural light photography.

You'll have to forgive the dinky size - I only had a muffin tray to cook them in. It did mean you could eat 3 or 4 at a time though. Also meant they held together really well when you ate them in your hand.

Not sure what your policy is on DIY pies vs store baked but here's the recipe if you're ever so inclined;

• Rump steak (seared quickly)
• One onion (softened and caramelised with balsamic and brown sugar)
• Three table spoons of wholegrain mustard.
• Tablespoon or so of Lea and Perrins.
• Can of crushed tomatoes.
• 3 ripe chopped tomatoes
• Two cups beef stock.
• Salt and pepper
• Short savory pastry for base.
• Flakey puff for topping.

You sear the meat in a big casserole pan then set aside. Caramelise onions for 10 minutes, then add meat back in, along with all the other ingredients. Simmer covered for 90 minutes with the lid on, stirring occasionally. Remove lid and simmer for another hour or until the consistency is nice and pie-like.

I added half the mustard in at the start and half right at the end as it seemed to need a bit more of an edge.

Line your pie tray with short crust pastry, fill with hot mixture, then seal with the flakey pastry (few fork holes to let the air out) and of course brush with a beaten egg.

Cook for 15 minutes at 180. Serve hot with a Central Otago Pinot of your choosing.

Good on ya cobber!

DTK.

They look fantastic, DTK - and I love the idea of wedging in a whole bunch of them in a sitting!

As for the store-bought vs home made question, I have no issue at all with home made pies...I love the idea that you can put whatever your favourite recipe is into a pie and enjoy it....I mean virtually anything you can think of works when encased in pastry. 

The pies I made were filled with my favourite recipe (possibly of all time; certainly on the shortlist of my potential last meal), Chris' Stracotto al Barolo - aka slow cooked beef cheek in red wine.

This is a secret family recipe that's been handed down from generation to generation, but bugger it dear readers - I'm going to share it with you next week and face the consequences later. As Herbs used to say, 'it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission'.  Words to live by.

Even if you don't feel like making pies out of it, the recipe itself is amazing and very simple to make...and with cooler weather approaching, it's the perfect time to get a few practice runs in before your next dinner party.

Thanks again to Chunderkilt for the guest review - much appreciated bro. In the coming weeks I also have another guest review from Sydney correspondent Crashball, who you may recall wrote the review on The Upper Crust bakery at Collaroy in May 2012 (another very popular review, that), and a brief one from Dicky, who is currently lost somewhere in remote western Queensland.

Until next time, take care.

Pieologist

The World's First Instant Pie

Q: how do you make something really good really bad really quickly?

A: add the word 'instant' to it.

Another one for the 'jumped the shark' category here: a former microbiologist turned factory worker has now turned pie-tamperer and invented the world's first 'instant' pie.

'Just add water' to your sachet of dehydrated mince, break out the long-life pastry case, combine, and bang it in the oven for 2-3 minutes - whereupon the steam from the mince seals the base pastry to the lid. Sounds delicious, doesn't it?

It also looks suspiciously like a vol au vent to me...or is Prasad doing some pie-ventriloquism?

Picture and story courtesy of Kristi Miller & News Ltd

Noble intentions of feeding our troops aside, I'm afraid your Pieologist has to say 'No Deal' to this one:


http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/australian-prasad-durairaj-invents-worlds-first-diy-meat-pie/story-e6freuy9-1226614026223

Golden King Bakery, 239 Waterworks Rd Ashgrove

The Golden King has been a part of Ashgrove forever – much like Campbell Newman. What’s that you say? Never mind. Suffice it to say, it’s been there for a long time and is definitely not a blow-in.

It’s a nice clean shop with heaps of parking around the back, which is very handy because it’s on a piece of Waterworks Rd that is usually busier than a Beirut bricklayer...street parking is pretty hopeless, unless you have the parking karma of a disabled person and always manage to jag an awesome one at the front door.

If you miss the driveway, take the next one and park under the ANZ Bank. They won’t notice, because half of them are being boned whilst the remainder count the latest multi-bazillion dollar profit.

Golden King is an Asian bakery that has really friendly staff, and when I was there on a stinking hot midweek lunchtime, it was quite busy with foot traffic.

The bakery has a short conventional menu:

o   Plain

o   Bacon

o   Curry

o   Mushroom

o   Pea

o   Onion

o   Chicken

The price is a measly $3.20 per pie – the cheapest I have come across in a long long time…at that price, order one of each! Pies are served in a foil nest, and are an average sized standard – 2 wouldn’t be an issue for any bloke, and the occasional bird.

I ordered a Curry Beef – (type 1), which had medium curry strength and a good yellow colour. It was a reasonably good pie, but the base was underdone to buggery. Good quality mince meat, no gristle or unidentifiable bits, good viscosity, good beefy flavour, and a really nice flaky buttery yellow lid. 

Score is 6.5/10 because the base pastry was too thick for my liking and undercooked. And I’m not feeling very generous today.

Beef & Mushroom

This pie was quite hot; it snuggled right up to my mouth’s pain threshold without causing permanent injury, and remained hot to the last bite.

The top was slapped on a bit skewiff – which made it look homey, though the structural integrity was seriously compromised by it as you can see from the photo. It took all my skill as an experienced Pieologist to finish it without dropping any. Would not pass the driving test (unlike the curry beef, which was fine).

It was filled with plenty of real sliced mushrooms, not canned champignons, making it taste ‘shroomy and very good. There was also a hint of rosemary – nice touch.

As you can see, there was quite a gelatine gloss to a mostly clear gravy – the mushrooms floating about in suspended animation like a Stanley Kubrick film. It looked a bit insipid, but wasn’t. There was a reasonably flaky top – but as per the curry beef, the base could have been cooked out a bit more for a far better result. I’m giving it another 6.5/10.

The King’s sausage rolls also looked fantastic – yellow and buttery-looking flaky pastry. I don’t eat many sausage rolls because I don’t own shares in Pfizer or whoever the hell makes Zantac; but I think I’d break my self-imposed embargo about as quickly as Brittney gave it up for the K-Fed for these puppies. They looked really flash.

(Sidebar: Wellsy and AJ tell me that the Ashgrove butcher does the best sausage roll in Brisbane, if you're in the neighbourhood...apparently he has a pie warmer in his shop.)

I’d been told elsewhere that The King used to do a mean pepper steak pie that contained ‘at least a tablespoon of cracked pepper in the center of the pie and pepper on the pastry top’, but that it had been removed ‘due to too many wussy complaints’. I can neither confirm nor deny the veracity of this statement, so I have no idea why I recounted it to you, but hey, what else would you be doing right now….working?

All in all, the Golden King is probably worth a visit if you’re the kind of pie-eater who likes their base underdone – and I know there are a lot who do. I’m looking in your direction, Plumber to the Stars. If you happen to make it there, I’d be keen to hear your impressions.

I also went to a bakery in the inner north recently, at Eagle Junction, called Baked to Perfection. Trust me, it isn't. I had a curry pie and a steak and kidney. Both were awful. In fact, they were the second-worst pies I've ever had, and that's saying something.

The curry pie (above) didn't have any discernible curry flavour, was lukewarm, flavourless, bready and shitful. Blah.

The steak and kidney was as skinny as a gypsy's dog, and just as mangy.

Again it was lukewarm and unseasoned, with cardboard-like pastry, and the chunks of kidney were as dry as a Pom's bath mat.

I disliked these pies so much, that I have declined to score them.

Incidentally, the worst pie I EVER had was from Tilly's Continental Bakery, at Stafford. I had the curry pie, and it was so bad that I had 3 bites, broke it in half to see what in the hell was going on inside it, and threw it in the bin. It was shiny and salty and cheap and gelatinous and the pastry was hard and overcooked - it was just FUBAR. I was that shocked, I forgot to take photos of its hideousness.

On a brighter note, I returned to Horners Bakery at Sorrento on the Goldie, and had another Sri Lankan Lamb Curry pie last week - and I'm happy to report that they're as good as ever. Love that bakery. 

Sadly, I also went to the Rock N Roll recently, and the Lamb Curry 10/10 pie is currently off the menu. They tell me that they may be back on the menu in a month or so (the menu items rotate periodically, apparently), but there's no set date, so don't get your hopes up too much (like I did) if you're heading there. Maybe Tim could do us all a favour and post when it's back on...

I hope that everyone out there in interwebland has a restful and safe Easter holiday, take care on the roads, and I'll endeavour to do a bit of work on your behalf on the pie front and check in with you all again soon.

Haveadirtcheapsilvertray.

Pieologist.